“The trip wasn’t the problem. It was the first time you said the truth out loud.”
He stared at me.
“You thought earning money meant you owned my time, my rest, and every choice in this house.”
“You’re keeping them from me.”
“Shan, we wanted those babies for years.”
“I still want them. You wanted the photos to post online.”
His face tightened. “You made me look terrible.”
“No, Ryan. You did that.”
***
Weeks later, he came to the old house for his first full visit.
Luna kicked beneath the play gym. Soleil slept nearby. Bodhi rested against Ryan’s chest.
“You did that.”
“I can help now,” he said.
“Helping is optional. Parenting isn’t.”
He looked around the warm, imperfect house. “Is there any chance for us?”
“No.”
The answer came easily.
***
After he left, Mom joined me on the porch.
The answer came easily.
I listened to my babies stirring inside.
“No. I regret how long I believed keeping my family together required losing myself.”
I opened the screen door.
Ryan had taken a vacation because he thought I hadn’t earned a break.
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